Update: a THREAT from my neighbors:
So, I came home from work and found this on my door. “Kristy,” or Ms. X. as I call her, has apparently been tipped off. So I guess she’s reading this now also so I’ll just switch tones and address her directly. Here we go:
Thanks for your note. I especially enjoyed the misspelling of my name and the super terrifying use of duct tape.
I guess things have been a little more complicated for the last few days for you than usual (although not much more, you and John fight ALL THE TIME), and I guess that’s partially due to me.
I would like to take this opportunity to apologize.
I would like to, but unfortunately, I cannot, because I am completely without remorse. Your little squabbles with your gambling-addicted boyfriend have tormented me at all hours for two years, so if you’ve had a crappy couple of days, I guess we’re close to even.
I can tell you’re upset, but here’s the thing: You posted a threat on my door. Not cool, “Kristy.” I say you and I just go back to our old ways. I won’t bother you and maybe you and John can learn to use your “inside voices.”
Deal? I’ll consider it a deal unless I hear otherwise.
PS “Dead Man” is two words.
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- ltlmonkey said: Can this possibly be real????? I really like you, but feel like you are messing me!
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- kat425 said: It’s been interesting to hear about all your accouints of the neighbors fighting. I’m planning a move to LA in a few months, though, and this is making me slightly apprehensive. Hope mine will be really nice!
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- isaacmarion said: The part about how you’d like to apologize but can’t is the funniest line I’ve heard in a while. I’m definitely using that.
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